Afraid Of Love Poem by Alan Strand

I am afraid of Love
For when she stares me in the eye
I freeze, I fight to breathe
As I drown in a sea of uncertainties.
I dread the loss
Of what could be.

I am afraid of Love
Reduced to an emotional puppet
The links between motive and action
Seem so tenuous
As I labour on wobbly legs
Under the sheer weight
Of unworthiness.

I am afraid of Love
That never lasts,
I gasp at the pain passed
Before you came around
And found me
Or did I find you
To renew my monogamous vow
Now, until it ends.

I am afraid to Love
I am OK with the sharing
And caring, the giving and living
As we race into the future
One heartbeat at a time,
It rips me up,
Will you be mine?

I am afraid of Love
Let’s be the best we can be
Is it destiny or should I be free
No, I’ve been down that path before
That exciting trail
Where ultimately avails- loneliness.
Ah, to wish for that special kiss!

I am afraid of Love
But even though she stalks me
In the dead of night
And lingers in dreamy sleep
Like your perfume on my pillow,
I clutch it close
And breathe in a deep sigh
For I am alive and I know
That Love will find me.

(For Christiane, 2002/10/21,0055 hours, at Rocky Point Pier.)