Again Poem by King Njoroge

Back to the drawing board
So frustrating, every single time
When you can't get it right
No matter how many times you try
Coming O so close
Everybody's losing faith
You can't trust anyone anymore
When you are anything but a winner
Count your losses and get back up
Saying maybe...just maybe today will be different
But it's not
In the evening, the end of the day
You are lying face first on the cold hard ground
Just like yesterday
Just like the day before
This has been my life
This is what I wake up to every morning
When I fall I get back up
When I'm pushed in the mud I dust off
When they think I can't take any more punishment
Because nobody before me could
And my bones can't take one more hit
My spirit is crushed into the wind of the night
My feet have no more strength to hold me up
Blood all over my face, I've lost vision
My eyes are shut tight, can't open
But I still have a breath, the last one I suppose
So I can go one more time
In this cycle of failure
Why do I even try?
I walk the streets alone
Surrounded by my fears
It's dark, It's cold, I'm alone
Hiding under layer after layer
Yet I'm still naked
Covering my face from the sun
Because I feel like I don't belong
I know I am not a waste of space
But why do they keep saying that?
Why do they constantly tell me to go back where I came from?
And where, where is home?
I thought for a moment that I could be one of them
I thought they understood
I thought we were family
They cast me aside
They pushed me away
They found their feet where I was weak
Took their knives, stabbed and stabbed
Until they saw me broken
Laid out on the floor
And couldn't get back up
I was dead for a second
Saw the light for a day
Believed in a better tomorrow for a lifetime
And yet here I am
Going back, back to step one
...back to the drawing board...