All I Have To Say Poem by pang david

You’ve been inside me for half a decade
Should I stop and free myself from you?
Will the pain fade away together with you when it happens?

I’ve been looking for pain in every inch of my body
But I failed
I’ve been numb for a year
Deaf for months
Blind for days and days pretending not to see anything
Can I still stand for another half a decade long?
Another half decade of pretending.
Another half decade of fooling myself.

I know..
You don’t need me to catch you when you fall
You don’t want me to stand for you
You don’t need me to be there beside you
You don’t even care if I die for you
I am not your savior
I am not your lover
Nor your angel.

Is it time to walk away?
Can I do that?
Am I scared of releasing you and will not knowing you at all?
Can I bare it?

I’ve been trap in this fire for so long
It burns every inch of me
It’s getting harder and harder to breath
But I can’t escape from it.
The sensation of heat that burns deep into my skin is the pain that I
cannot feel.
Feels like dying but my soul can’t leave this body
I am still breathing together with this weak soul.

All I have to say is Goodbye
Walk to a different path
And leave behind me your shadow that embracing me since the
beginning
But I can’t find the words to tell you

Can I stand the numbness?
The life of a lifeless
Can this goodbye make me stand again?
How foolish I am asking about numbness and lifeless is?
Where ever since the beginning you’re not mine
You can never be mine
Then what’s the sense of all this things
Old brother once wrote
‘It is time to put one foot ahead of the other’
To move on
To have a life without you
To breathe air without your sense in it
To have forever without you as a part of it
It’s time for my last wave
Time to finally say GOODBYE
At last