Inspiration, without hesitation
Leads to ramblings of a curious sort.
Meter, rythme, and moods? Throw all of them out!
'I hurt' says nothing to readers about
Why you 'hurt'. Concrete images do that.
'He even gave my apartment key back.'
Then, revise that to five words. It's a start.
Readers will decide! Don't say 'broke my heart.'
Revise! Revise! Writing is a word game.
Write your first draft. Revise it all again.
To these 'bare bones' add a dash of meter.
Salt rythme, pepper mood...nothing is sweeter
Than a tight, polished poem! Of which you're proud!
Never forget...you're talking to a crowd.
Excellent perspective and a splendid tour of your workshop. I love the way you leave the ultimate fulfillment of your poems to the imagination of your readers who are absolutely required to share in acts of creation.
At school the kids start the day with 'show and tell'. In poetry it's better to show than tell. You're spot on with this piece. Trust the initial inspiration and don't be afraid to cull, cull cull. If you don't prune the tree, you'll get lots and lots of tiny wee fruit, most of which dropp to the ground without ripening. If you prune rigorously, the fruit will have space to grow and grow sweet for the picking. A wonderful poem from a wonderful poet. love, Allie xxxx
Absolutely! Couldn't agree more. Very well put. Regards, Margery R.
Elysabeth, yes, you're talking to a crowd - of strangers. If you consider you know them you've already compromised what you write. I like what you say as it is the essence of poetic refinement. Saying more with less leaves a reader in no doubt of the role they are expected to play... Rgds, Ivan
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
Good advice. And a very good poem, :)