At 8: 40 Pm Poem by Shogunoka Ledesma III

At 8: 40 Pm

Rating: 4.5


Meet me at six, she said
I shaved at four, I think
Got dressed at four-twenty, I’m sure
Arrived at quarter-to-five, I checked
Have been waiting since then

I will take a taxi, she said
She doesn’t like me, I think
But I like her, I’m sure
Brought her flowers, I checked
Have been waiting since then

I won’t be late, she said
It’s past six, I think
She’s worth the wait, I’m sure
I have her picture, I checked
Have been waiting since then

I do like you, she said
So she loves me, I think
I will make her happy, I’m sure
Bought her the ring, I checked
Have been waiting since then

Let’s see what happens, she said
That means no, I think
It’s almost seven, I’m sure
My hands are sweaty, I checked
Have been waiting since then

He’s just a friend, she said
She’s not coming, I think
He likes her, I’m sure
It’s past eight, I checked
Have been waiting since then

I love you, she said
I’m hearing things, I think
Must be the traffic, I’m sure
She’s not here, I checked
Have been waiting since then

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Cynthia Aluning 17 February 2006

A poem that tells a story, almost narrative in context, realistic so it doesnt require more imagery, it rhymes good with the good blend of accented and unaccented syllables, it swayed a rhythm in fact...tone was quite a bit sad and frustrating, the message was successfully conveyed. Oh...that was a blind date! Ain't it? --cynthia

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Eila Mahima Jaipaul 10 February 2006

Oscar, I'm reading a wonderful piece of work, I'm sure. -Eila

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