Attempted Murder Poem by Zen Bojczuk

Read in a an email some time ago
Story of a woman I don't know
Sitting there for an hour or more
In a parking lot outside the store

She answered a stranger with dread
Said she was shot in back of the head
Not wanting brains to ooze to the floor
She refused to open her locked car door

Desperately paramedics finally broke in
Their horror quickly turned into a grin
There was something the woman did not know
'Gunshot' - an exploding canister of dough

Wad of biscuit dough hit her from behind
Glob of squishy substance her hands did find
Making a connecting and assuming the worst
When it was only a dough canister burst

As a public service to my blonde PH friend
A bit of advice in a silly poem I hereby send
Not smart leaving dough in a hot car - no doubt
Or you may assume gunshots and brains falling out