Call For Help Poem by Ima Ryma

Welcome - Psychiatric Hotline.
Multiple personality -
Press buttons 5,6,8 and 9.
Press 1 over repeatedly
If an obsessive/compulsive.
If manic/depressive, just press,
But an answer - no one will give.
If co-dependent, more or less,
Then ask somebody to press 2.
And if you are schizophrenic,
Then a little voice will tell you
Which number to press you should pick..

Anxious - press buttons uncontrolled.
Anal retentive - then press hold.