Crocodile Skin Poem by Herbert Nehrlich

Crocodile Skin

Rating: 5.0

I walked another endless mile
to spot at last, a crocodile.
Had heard from knowledgeable mates
and Publicans in hot debates
that one must nowadays acquire
an extra belt, just like a tyre.
To ward off bullets and mean words
and deadly rays as well as turds
so what I needed was a beast
of thirteen metres, at the least
I'd jump upon its beady eyes
and soon you'd hear those desperate cries,
I have a novel theory
and dentistry is here the key.
You see, if one can separate
the upper from the lower plate,
and dislocate the jaw at once
(you'd need the strength of several Huns)
the beast would be out of control
unable to perform the roll
that crocodiles are famous for.
Well, here I am, a moonlit shore
and there it is, a silent ripple
a stab of pain affects my nipple
but with a leap of faith at last
I hurl myself and fly right past
the monster of our waterways
I see him coming, in the haze.
A croc can swim a little faster
he is the undisputed master
and as he comes to now ingest
my body I shall do my best
I grab the mandibles in back
but right away, I feel the lack
of powers needed to succeed
his bite now crushes, makes me bleed
the battle rages just a minute
as to his skin, I soon am in it.

Gina Onyemaechi 03 May 2006

You do love a gory finish don't you, Herbsy? : -) Another comic tale of human failings. Love, Gina.

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Herbert Nehrlich1 01 May 2006

But if you stick two fingers in the croc may open wide and grin you see, they have an ancient rule bite off the head of any fool who's dumb enough and even lingers and trusts the power of his fingers. I talk about this in my poem it takes an expert just to know 'em. Too bad I ended up inside the much admired leather hide I should have specified my wishes and hid behind the friendly fishes. The Gods cannot be blamed for this a thickened skin, it can be bliss. H

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Michael Shepherd 01 May 2006

I'm told you stick two fingers in their eyes but that's not experience just surmise it may not quell your worstest fears just a hidebound tale of crocodile tears

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Danny Reynolds 01 May 2006

And tomorrow, his wife will be sporting a matching set of Poet-skinned shoes and hand bag? Danny

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