Date With A Vampire Poem by Damian Cranney

There once was a vampire quite fat,
Who was partial to fricassee of rat?
He liked to drink blood, but rat he did favour,
It really was quite peculiar behaviour.

But Vladimir had more problems than that,
He no longer could turn himself, into a bat,
He still had the need to hang upside down,
So would stand on his head, in a dressing gown.

He went on a date with a zombie, of late,
Who though recently deceased, he really did rate,
It was going quite well, till they got up to dance,
When, Zelda the Zombie went into a trance.

She was still for a moment but started to shake,
And then parts of her body began to break,
Her arms fell off first and then her head,
But the loss of her legs stopped the evening dead.

Vladimir kept his composure quite well,
He was disappointed of course but you couldn’t tell,
He picked her up gently, and sent her home in a cab,
He has a date with her next week, at Frankfurters Lab.