Desire Poem by Savannah Churchill
Desire
Just because I'm delicate
Doesn't mean I can't handle
The cut of your teeth
On the back of my neck
So come on my love
Dive into my flesh
Don't be afraid
To taste a little blood
Just because I'm delicate
Doesn't mean I won't like
The feel of your hand
Slap the face of my skin
So come on my love
Spank me from behind
Don't you stop
'Til it's lollipop red
Just because I'm delicate
Doesn't mean my flesh
Won't like the feel
Of the crack of a whip
So come on my love
Bring it down with a snap
Place it's smooth leather
On the raw of my hide
Just because I'm delicate
Doesn't mean I won't enjoy
The feel of a pinwheel
Rolling across my flesh
So come on my love
Cradle it's sleek body
In the palm of your hand
Wrap your fingers around my fetish
Just because I'm delicate
Doesn't mean I can't be bound
By three feet of shibari rope
Embracing me inside its design
So come on my love
Snake it around my waist
Slither it up my spine
Rest it at the base of my desire
The final three lines show a great deal of promise. If you make your body and that of the persona you address as real as you make the devices, it would be much improved. As it is, it never quite achieves eroticism.
Raw, yes, is how I would describe it..yes, like in 'green'. But even I am guilty of that when I write about something that is 'new' to me. Practice makes perfect.
Ignore the previous comments - I think that is is raw and emotional and I loved it - keep it up, you are doing great. Desire is my favourite of all your poems. Well Done!
A bit primitive but....perhaps you are just starting? I will read more of your stuff soon (2006) . Right now I have had enough. H
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
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4/19/2024 5:30:09 PM # 1.0.0.1119
the great truth of lust never diminshes keeps singing in the heart a sweet wail until the soul leaps desire calling and calling like the burning of stars the sparks hitting flesh and feeling good a fine poem