Empty Poem by KIP MDP

I find myself feeling empty
Not just once or twice a day
I feel it at every moment
Every single day

I don't remember when it started
I don't know when it will end
All I understand is that I feel empty
And it hurts me from within

I have not particularly asked for help
I have yet to make a move
I know that I need it though
From deep within my soul

This emptiness has made me cry
It made me feel down and worthless

Angry

Bitter

Lonely

And many more negative emotions

But it always goes back to the empty feeling
That I feel in my heart and chest
It weighs down on me at every moment
And makes it hard for me to rest

I don't have a healthy sleeping schedule
Nor do I care much for my body
I just don't care what happens in life no more

For me I am just there
Whether I'm here or not nothing will change

Yet I promise myself and to you
That I won't ever hurt myself

But please know it is not because I fear death
It is mainly a fear of pain

And I know it is also that I am a coward
But I'd rather wait for death to find me
Than for me to go find death

At least if I did that it wasn't that I gave up on life
It would have been an accident I couldn't change

It wouldn't be my fault

No one could blame me on my own death

But as everyday passes on
The emptiness stays forever constant
And life continues to grow duller

And here I wait as always
With a hollow chest and heart
For when something would change
In the world that is empty to me