Equals Poem by Robert Edgar Burns

Today women are treated as equals.
Those who aren't wear corrective bras.
When buying reconditioned plumbing supplies,
You'll get the best deal you ever saw.

A man who tells you he's boss at his house,
Will lie about other things too.
If you can't succeed, be smart enough,
To blame someone who is not you.

If the Indians are so darn unhappy,
With the way they are treated by us,
Let them go back where they came from.
But let them sit on the front of the bus.

I am the twin brother of Colin Powell.
I was the white sheep of the family.
One day daddy wanted to tan our hides,
Colin couldn't run as fast as me.

I never poke fun at our President.
It bothers me when it's done today.
Don't kick one who doesn't know what he's doing,
Unless you're Letterman or Leno I say.

I asked for three lumps in my coffee
But I was hit with a coffee pot twice.
I taught them basic arithmetic
When I punched them in the face then thrice.

If tomatoes are a fruit, but for salads,
Is an apple good for vegetable stew?
If everything equaled out in life,
It would be boring like me and you!