Haiku-Ii Poem by Shreej k.c

I can't see the comments I've written.. mmm.. trying to put here everything again: Your write: ''untimely drizzle gigantic taro leaf serves frogs giggle for more'' 1. is ''untimely drizzle'' a clue for a certain season? [for the Japanese 'Purist Schools', a haiku has** to contain a kigo (reference to the season) ] ** Must - from their point of view - But we are non-Japanese... ;) 2. ''gigantic taro leaf serves'' here you use a verb ('serves') to go beyond the image. This is not correct for 'classical haiku'. You should describe an event - 'freezing it' (like in taking a photo) . Therefore, you have to focus on the event (the 'thing' in itself) , avoiding an analysis of the situation. 3. ''frogs giggle for more'' better to stop at ''frogs giggle''. A bit of irony is accepted in haiku poetry, but just a bit. [remember that we're talking of 'classical haiku'] ''serves'' is no good. You should describe an event - like sort of 'freezing it' (think of taking a photo) . That is: you have to focus on the event (the 'thing') in itself, avoiding any analysis of the situation. So, at the end, my suggestion is: '' untimely drizzle - under a huge taro leaf frogs giggle '' [of course.. you can take it or not.. :) ]

3. frogs giggle for more I would stop at 'frogs giggle' - a bit of irony is accepted in a haiku, but just a bit.. [we're talking of 'classical haiku', remember]

2. gigantic taro leaf serves mmm.. 'serves' is no good.. you should describe an event - like sort of 'freezing it' (think of taking a photo) . You have to focus on the event (the 'thing') in itself, avoiding any analysis of the situation.

1. is 'untimely drizzle' a clue for a certain season? [for the Purists, a haiku has to contain a kigo (reference to the season) ]