I'd Rather Forget Poem by Leria Hawkins

Date: April 15,2009
By: Sandra Hamrick

I poured with upmost care
Into your awaiting palms
Faith, honesty and love everlasting
Risking a fragile spirit
And a closely guarded soul
All for the chance of acceptance

And I waited long and patient
Watching as time carried away my reward
Slowing wasting, dwindling down
From abounding and powerful
To almost non-existent
As my dreams proved futile

Though the salve was plentiful
The substance was lost
As my spirit was forsaken
In lieu of the fleshy cage
Where intricacies of the shell
Proved more alluring than the pearl

Yet I persevered, forever hopeful
Standing firm as seasons became years
And in spite of the chill
Passion grew and flourished
My cup spilling over
Only to freeze in drifts of fallen snow

And in the silence between the storms
I searched for a hidden clue, or tell-tale sign
But found only emptiness, and indifference
And though my heart screamed foul and pleaded for favor
The cold hand of truth struck out with a shattering intensity
And I shuttered as repercussions brought clarity to my weary soul

It seems at last, my heart found the long sought after acceptance
Not in the silly notion of equality between our hearts or souls
But in the painful acceptance of the inevitable
And the crystal clear realization of my delusions
There is no future here to love and nurture
There are only bittersweet memories I'd rather forget

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Copyright © 2009 Leria Hawkins, All Rights Reserved