I'm A Republican Poem by Randy McClave

I'm a Republican, and I'm for sale
I am both woman and male,
I will proudly go to the highest bidder
Before you buy, I hope my party you'll first consider.
Also you might need to post my bail.

I'm a Republican, until the day I die
And for you I will cheat and steal and lie,
And to everyone that will ever listen
I will proclaim to them all that I'm a Bible thumping Christian.
And also for you all facts I will deny.

I'm a Republican, proud and true
Everyone against me, I will always try to screw,
And if I don't get things done my way
I will plead for donations and for me all will pray.
I will always do whatever the highest bidder wants me to do.

I'm a Republican, and I hate the poor and the needy
I would rather help the rich and the greedy,
They always have the money to pay my bills
So, I help them to get tax breaks for more thrills.
I don't mind being called dirty and seedy.

I'm an Republican, and I want a border wall
That is my firmest belief and call,
We must keep all of our evil neighbors out
They must not be allowed in I'll shout.
Even though Reagan told Mr. Gorbachev to take down his wall

I'm a Republican, and I believe in our God given right
And for them one and all I will always fight,
I believe the government should not control any of us
Unless you are woman, then it is just
I am a proud Republican and I am white.

Randy L. McClave