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Impossible Transformation

I can't transform
myself in someone
else
I need the
calmness and a
strategy to go
on with life
Probably in my
life I will
have a vlog
I have to
teach myself some
discipline because I
need to be
comfortable with everything
I'm so confused
on what I
want
In this period
I want only
spend money because
it is my
only consolation
Sometimes I wish
nothing bother me
Very often I
dream to have
a healthy lifestyle
In my future
house everything has
a place
Sometimes staying at
home all day
is crazy and
bad
I don't want
to upset my
life to have
more privileges
Very often I
dream to want
a safe and
rigid routine
For my nature
I need to
do the same
actions every day
I don't see
any light in
my life
I'm totally alone
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4/17/2021 2:38:33 AM # 1.0.0.559