Ladies Man Poem by Randy Johnson

I came home early one day and saw my wife in bed with another man.
I grabbed my shotgun and you should've saw how fast he ran.
I immediately got a divorce and married somebody new.
But I came home one day and found her in bed with that man too.
I threw him through the window and he got cut by the glass.
A big shard of it got stuck up his ass.
I married a third time and I caught her and that same man in bed.
I made my german shepherds attack him and I let my mule kick him in the head.
I reluctantly decided to marry wife number four.
But I caught her with the same man like the times I did before.
This man is someone I've always hated.
I had all I could take so I grabbed a knife and now he's been castrated.