Limerick For A Friday Night Poem by Herbert Nehrlich

I once dated an overweight girl.
She was cute and her first name was Shirl.
When we tried to make love
after push and much shove
she kept saying let's give it a whirl.

But the distance from me to her core
was extensive, and things did get sore.
So we had to abort
'cause he WAS way too short
yet she asked me try a bit more.

So I went out with someone so skinny
who was braless and only wore mini.
When we started our battle
there was pubic bone rattle
and her navel was truly an innie.

Well I went back to Shirl in a flash.
And discovered that Shirl had a rash.
So she went to the quack
and she never came back.
Monday morning she'd turned into ash.

So I told myself now to abstain.
From all sexual 'ta-ta' I'd refrain.
I'd ignore all new co-ed's
and join some good poets
and would hide my best friend in my brain.