Mary And Harry - An Outhouse Tale Poem by Herbert Nehrlich

Mary had a man who sat
all day on the shitter,
Harry sat but hardly shat,
because his wife was bitter.

She had a sour face all day
and nights she turned the tables,
when Harry had big hopes to play
she sent him to the stables.

One day when Harry was alone
he went out to the Dunny,
hung up a sign, said Harry's Throne
and giggled, it was funny.

When Mary came to see her man
chained to the bloomin' shitter,
she handed him a garbage can
and that's when Harry hit her.

You see she wanted to convey
that he was really loaded,
with crap, but be that as it may
all trust had now eroded.

So Harry stayed upon his throne
that's where he met his Devil,
the Devil used his mobile phone
to call his brother Neville.

Hey Neville, I've got one for you
he's in a lavatory
the place just reeks of pee and pooh
wait til I tell the story.

So Neville came, took him away
they'd put him in the fryer,
but Mary, who was quite okay
she aimed for something higher.

She'd fallen in the smelly pit
and hidden deep down under,
by putting up with all that shit
she stole the devils' thunder.

And if you think this tale is weird
(perhaps it IS a riot) ,
just think that Mary never feared
and in the shit kept quiet.