Mr Johnson Wax: The Poem Polisher Poem by Shaun Cronick

Let's start at the very beginning,
A very good place to start.
Just echoing the words of Julie Andrews,
As I pick your poem apart.

You called me to have a look,
And to polish it up a bit,
Raise it to a high standard,
So it doesn't read like shit.

Tut tut tut! You naughty naughty boy!
Using two silly words instead of one.
I simply sprinkle my poetry magic,
And repair the damage that is done.

Hello what's this! Another typo,
Do you really know how to spell.
Or do you write in a twilight world,
Under a very poorly lit stairwell.

Now we arrive at the last verse,
You're pushing a word to make it fit,
You're foolishly forcing a rhyme,
That will end up reading likes hit.

Here's my hideously overpriced bill,
Please don't be dismayed and glum.
A polished poem soon adored by millions,
And a Poet Laureate you will become.