My Finest Acting Was At Your Wedding. Poem by Ray Mesa

That’s not an aisle it’s a slippery road
And all I’m seeing is a collision at the end
That’s not a man; it’s a god damn boy
Trust me, I’m your friend
But not anymore, I guess my words did bite
They did attack you, maybe they just right

And I guess it's my fault I did click send
With that transition, I surely lost my best friend
An apology was sent with the same Enter key
But that just sent you away and left me with me.

Look at what this whole ordeal left behind
A smoker’s cough and a shortened life
Now when I stop to look around I just find
Everything I did wrong and nothing you did right

I have far more skills then crushing a cracker
I can also fake a smile as you say your vows
Seconds after, the whole situation just feels blacker
And here I am, Asking How?
How could not just lie, Just lie to keep someone I cared for
I’ll tell you god well I’m standing in your house, I’d kill just to talk to her

And when your priest asks, should these two not wed?
How am I supposed to sit there and not scream?
Oh god, if I say it let this regret be my last, because it’s been a tumor in my head.
Oh god, Say this all has just been a bad horrible dream.

You’ll find this poem someday, and know the real way I feel
But until then, I’ll lie, Lie just to see you smile even if it’s not real