On The Reanimation Of Lifeless Human Tissue Poem by Bob and Alex Eichen

In my personal experiments to resurrect the dead, I have taken the following actions:

Laid in bed all day crying.
Laid in bed all night staring at the ceiling.
Drank gin till noon, whiskey till oblivion.
Given up bathing and brushing my teeth.
Stopped all hobbies.
Stopped calling my friends.
Stopped excercising.
Gained thirty pounds eating bacon.

To date, all the above actions have proven to be ineffectual in bringing lost love back. Life is harder now. My efforts must continue.