Pick A Good Name For Your Dog Poem by Warren Brown

D'you reckon a dog would be concerned
D'you think it could it have a bad effect
D'you think his feelings could be burned
If he hadn't a name that stood the test?

I mean, a dog is a noble critter, mostly
Though there's some that ain't, I will allow
There are some that should be ghostly
These are the ones that should'a got shot somehow!

But by and large, the dog is a noble critter
With noble dogs I can treat them as equal
With good manners and regal looks, they're never bitter
And I am proud to be their friend and all

But when it comes to names, well………
There's some that's right and some will never do!
Naming a dog Mawson, its ticket straight to hell
Not for the dog, he's OK, it's the owner I'm talking to!

Another comes to mind, he's almost kith and kin
A small and woolly and short legged hound
His mistress thinks the Sun shines out of him
He'd be "orright" ‘cepting he's too close to the ground!

Mawson! God help us!
Scruffy! Oh, the shame!
Fergus! Now there's a grand old name!
And Molly! Full of fleas but the bestest dog around!
And we would just love to have another hound!