Poem For A Child That Was Never Conceived Poem by Gert Strydom

Somewhere at a time
I thought that you would be part of my life,
but the relationship
in which I wished you to come forth was shattered

into broken pieces
and then when I met somebody
who would have been a perfect mother,
who knew how to love selflessly

destiny brought her to an early grave
and maybe from then on I did not truly want you,
it’s not that I have not desired
to have you in my life

but I have lost myself along the way,
have raised someone else’s children
as if they were my very own
and have lost them too

when their mother
moved in with her new lover
and sometimes I think
that your presence would have been a joy

but I am living in a world
on the brink of disaster,
with nothing to continue my legacy,
but the words that I leave

yet at times you are present in my dreams,
at times its as if your tiny fingers
fold around mine,
as if you are throbbing in my blood.