Seeking Solace Poem by Vinaya Joseph

I am weak,
God, mentally broke
And I am seeking help,
Without any shame,
I have faith in you,
That you are not going
To leave me alone,
In this moment,
Of pain…

Now or ever,
Kindly don't turn
Deaf and blind,
To my woes
Am I so unworthy of your love?
Where did I go wrong?

Where are you?
Why are you so silent?
What lessons are you trying to teach me?
People say move on,
What if I can't?
What if I am finding it difficult?
What if I am not strong as others?
Tonnes of advice,
That I hear…
Can't get stuck by people's behaviour,
I know all this and more
True love never departs,
It is simply fake friendship,
That withers away with time,
And it should not be hurting,
But my heart is bleeding,
And I don't want to lie to myself,
Why is someone else's promiscuity killing me?
Does not make sense,
Does it?
Why are my eyes clouded with tears?
For someone who does not care?
Why do I have a lump in my throat?
Remembering someone who does not deserve my friendship?

I need to tame this bloody mind of mine,
Put these drowsy thoughts to rest,
Find solace in poetry and photography,
Forget men, one day when you die
You have to leave your own body,
What else to say
For this is the nature of life

God, give me peace of mind
Please do!