Sepah Poem by Nassy Fesharaki

Sepah

I was born in Iran
You can read or stop.

In the army had a job
But was not satisfied.

By changing uniforms
I worked in the Air Force.

Being born in the village
Meant living as a shepherd.

Or could have farmer's life,
It was changed, due to the time.

Poverty and pride
Led me to risk my life.

I borrowed books that read
And worked hard, no secret.

Did not follow parents,
Loving them was endless.

To me they were simple
Religious, and Muslims.

I selected friends
Of many varied faiths.

Saw movies of all kinds
Hindi, Rock, to River Kwai.

For each book and movie
I found some company.

Each of them had a thought
I listened, then shared mine.

They, to me, were candles,
Like torches lit the tunnels.

My friends were teachers
And we had shared teachers.

After ended schools
Everyone went his way.

I wished to join college
To add to my knowledge.

No support, money rare,
Wished was in fifth grade
When she, master, teacher
Took my hand, what a help.

She chose this village boy
And favored, as her own.

When schools were over
Found no guide, supporter
Like that in the fifth grade,
Felt as if was orphaned.

Had money, just little
To attend a single term,
Paid the fee, prepared
To take the college test.

Went broke, moneyless
To afford the next term.

Through films, stories
Had observed and noticed
How spies and the police
Forged papers and writings.

I took some potato
Made a stamp with a half
For forging a card to pass,
Feel the guilt's sediment.

Saw how poor, handicapped,
Is forced to become wax.

There, heard of a college:
"Is free, they will pay…"

I found their location,
Was misled, misguided,
Told me lies as answers.

Had success with the test,
In no time, I joined them
And became a cadet.

Now was in uniform,
In Military College
To become an officer.

Said nothing to parents,
Unaware, knowledgeless
Could not be consultants.

Soon after felt was jailed,
Pretenders were masons,
Their bricks were liars!

Said Commander, Major,
No permit to leave them,
He frowned, threatened:
"First you must pay the debt,
And then be sent to the jail,
After that become a soldier
To serve a forced two years, "
And went on, on and on.

In fear, I became
Some clay for a potter.

Unwilling, unwanted
I had to stay there.

Meant to leave, run away,
Hitting roads and channels.

Had lost me to myself,
Wore clothes of soldiers.

Felt very sad, in chains
Till arrived miracles.

Came pilots on the stage
And spoke of success.

We, all, were invited,
The hosts were lecturers:
"You can be like ourselves."

It served me to escape
The house of corruption.

There the guns sat on the rack
While cheaters gave commands.

Once came down with a rappel,
Shah saw me and questioned:
"Did you tell their parents? "

"Of course, your Majesty,
Parents watch their TVs, "
Wanted to inform shah:
"No, no, no, he tells lies! "

My parents were Muslims,
TV meant gate to hell…"

Passing tests, joined Airforce
Wore blue uniforms.

One day and after years
Talked to me, my father:
"Saw a change in color."

Had noticed by sudden
Uniforms changed color.

He was the best father
Free, open-minded,
Never asked of reason
Or of what had happened.


Poverty and efforts
As well as varied friends
Impacted with influence
To make me different
From rest, brothers.

They were far closer
To Islam of parents,
But I seemed a pagan.

Moving to the Airforce
Was a jump to changes
But still felt in chains.

Having need for income
Was a cause to work hard,
Among things I had done
Was selling some booklet.

The course "Step by step"
Helped to learn English,
I sold to earn money
And read it freely.

I was called to speak
And the booklet helped me.

Took test of English,
I passed it, was easy.

Destined for the USA
Rome, Montreal, and later
Headed for New York,
San Anton of Texas…

In Lackland took courses
Also, found some friends
Learned to talk English.

Like clay and the wax
In the palms of artists,
Learned about politics.

Like the air in a balloon,
Squeezed, I felt pushed!

Decrees were clear:
"Officers must listen
And obey the orders."

That was not, is not me!
That was not, is not me!
That was not, is not me!

I needed freedom
And for it had to burst.

Could not be a dumb, deaf
To the needs of people
Could not kill and murder.

That was not, is not me!
That was not, is not me!
That was not, is not me!

High rankers around Shah
Never learned of our hearts,
Poor Shah counted on us...

No one said these people
Are gathered by mistake
Or are forced and afraid!

They saw us as the dolls
And blind horses, cows,
To fetch like hunter dog.

Shah counted on planes
And the tanks, frigates.

Khamenei and friends,
Sepah is, can be same!

Nation needs freedom
Not a mass of soldiers.