She Has Finally Come Out Poem by Alexander Shaumyan

'To get money, I take a vacuum cleaner and vacuum myself for my husband's business friends, yes and they too inflate me, using a cycle pump. I put the tube into my vagina and then they inflate me.' -Anaïs Nin

'...It was a garage where people parked their cars and had work done on their cars, mechanical work. Then Anais Nin said: Oh, I know this garage very well, I have sex with all the men there and they pay me very well for it.' - Lila Rosenblum


She has finally come out
Of her sexual closet,
As she admitted her preference
For both men and women -
It took her long enough
But she's done it -
Announced it once and for all
That she likes the taste and
Smell of another woman,
That no man can truly satisfy her
Like her secret lover -
Another Anaïs Nin incarnate -

And I, being a fool in all this,
Feel strangely relieved,
For somehow I felt inadequate
As a male, unable to completely
Satisfy her animal passions -
But now I know that there is
One thing I lack that she craved
All along - a soft breast to pinch on
And suck on, and the moist throbbing
Center between the legs...

No, my sexual apparatus is quite
Crude and can never replace her
Sex toys or the ecstasy of sharing
Her female lover, who instinctively
Understands her changing moods
And female nuances
Better than any gay guy
Or her effeminate boy toy -

For no one had ever made her
Climax like her girlfriend,
As they writhed and trembled
Inside the sheets of ecstasy
And guilty pleasure -

And I. Well, I was a just a curiosity
Left with my tail between my legs,
Knowing that it was not what she
Really wanted. Because I wanted
Just to get to know her better
Before we did the dirty thing...
But she just wanted to surrender
To her unbridled female passions
And make me scream with desire.

While all I wanted was just
A little companionship.


September 18,2006