Smother. Poem by Kim Dang

Smother any indications of my arrested heartbeat,
Mute the shocks which reverberate through my body
Bat away the strengths in my distractions
Convince myself this is not happening
Let's purposely disregard this anomaly
Close this Pandora's box to see if it changes
anything.

A deviation doesn't give me any reason
to commit these day dreams
A gentlemen's gesture doesn't mean I'm not sold lemons
A wanted reciprocation could still leave me cliff hanging
completely empty.
It's like concocting life from silhouettes
It could still be all canteened in my head;
such elaborate fabrications, my asinine imaginings.

But silently I'm hoping for some truth to this personified mirage
So I could hold on for ten more seconds, before I discard,
promises of a possible oasis.
To safeguard my sanity, my nonchalant mind won't allow me the prerogative
to chase this,
Thus provisionally, instead of holding my breath, I'm exhaling.

The ball is in your court; even after how fragile you've left me
I'm still going to give you my most coercive serve swing,
regardless if, against my wishing, the score resides at Love, Forty.
It's game point, baby.
Where's the joy in all this teasing, if I submit to your victory,
this easily?