Sometimes Death Is Better Poem by Moore Hope

As I sit here alone at night
I think about giving up on my fight
I was used once so why not again
All I ask for is for all this pain to end.
I don't like to be forced into things I don't want
But when I say no, there is always some kind of taunt.
A forced ride in the car or a push on the bed
Makes me wish more and more that I could be dead.
Friendship is not good enough, it has to be love
With those words said, the stand beneath me is given a shove.
With a noose around my neck, I hang in the air
Gasping for breath for death is near.
Only half of the time someone will come and cut the rope
The rest of the time I am left there to choke.
I am forced to make decisions based on my life
But if I say what I really feel, to my throat will be a knife.
So of course I lie to appease his command
But some uncurable disease on me is what I demand.
I feel that my presence in life is a mistake
That God has given me some kind of horrible fate.
The future I look forward to is very dim
The darkness of my world has prevented me to win.
I don't exactly want to kill myself, I just want to disappear
To change my identity forever and to move elsewhere.
But if I can't do that I'll always have a thought in my head
That sometimes death is better, I should want to be dead.