That Pain Exists Is Necessary Lord (In Reply To Breyten Breytenbach) Poem by Gert Strydom

That pain exists is necessary Lord,
as it purifies me
and the more I suffer the nearer it brings me,
it brings You nearer to me

and at times Your crucifixion is too terrible
to understand, it torments me
to think that mere man
could act so mercilessly, so revolting,
like the deranged could shout and scream
to kill You, Lord
and some of them murderous
leaning forward and jump up and down

and although Your death is a realisation
of many prophecies,
Your suffering paid the price for the lot of man,
I am still lost
in your unselfish love
that demands from Your Father
to leave the perpetrators without reckoning,
the people that were spitting on You,
the people that hated You
and nobody can understand such deep love,
that does not turn around self, or own profit

but your pain and suffering was necessary Lord
and although some turn their backs on You
I beg You to keep me on the right way,
for Your help to unlearn my own conceit,
that is harming our relationship.

[Reference: breyten bid vir homself (breyten prays for himself) by Breyten Breytenbach.]