The Clouds Are Weary Poem by olawale famodun
The Clouds Are Weary
Rating: ★5.0
The clouds are weary,
Weary moving in the skies,
Skies bloated with blood.
Wednesday, November 4, 2015
Topic(s) of this poem: dark
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4/26/2024 8:54:39 PM # 1.0.0.1119
this one, on the contrary (see my comment on your poem ''Transformation of love'') , is a true haiku. It is about Nature (a Sunset, in all it's 'African' glory, right?) and respects the 5-7-5 structure. A kigo is not expressed, but (as I wrote on the other page) in modern haiku - and also in a tiny minority of classical haiku - , especially when written by non-Japanese-people, a kigo can be missed.. Sunset does express by itself a ''small'' kigo (it doesn't identify a Season, but a part of the day) . The comma between the 2 'skies' is the kireji separating the two different 'ideas' / images.. GOOD Thanks for sharing, Olawale Peace
Thank you Doc. Fabrizio Frosini for your wonderful comments which are extremely educative, enlightening and first class. I would now title my forthcoming Japanese-titled three-line poem collection as haikai then. I will explore using kigo in the future. I do know that haikus don’t necessarily have titles, but I have seen where this is done; however, I will take to your advice. Kindly explain the difference between 7-5-5 and 5-5-7 syllabic structure. Thank you once again.