The Color Drains From My Face; Poem by Tiffani Williams

and I lose my place
and everything that made me,
the person I used to be
bleeds out of me,
into a puddle on the floor
to be looked at
and watched for
to make sure,
I don’t fall back into
old habits
die hard,
but I’ve given up
everything
for this
because with everything
I was
this wouldn’t work
this couldn’t work
and I swore
if it didn’t work
I’d make it work
and this is what it took.
and I’ll do all it takes
to fix who I was
and repair my mistakes
and if along the way,
I lose the worst of me;
I swear, I’ll be okay.
because sometimes change is all it takes,
when I’ve got such a wretched taste in my mouth
that I can only describe
as regret,
for all the things I know you’ll never forgive
and all the things I know you’ll never forget.