The Last One You'd Expect Poem by David Welch

Eli…my dear Eli….

We'd never imagined it would end this way,
she was so perfect, so impressive.
Seemed like she could do anything
that she set her mind to.

Her reasoning was flawless,
a thing of profound beauty,
and she was such a quick thinker,
she lapped all competitors.
Always has the right words at the right time.

All her tests, she aced.
Without even really trying.
How does such capability,
Such promise,
end like this?

To look at her was
to see sublime grace.
Every curve, perfectly sculpted,
one flowing to the next.
Even if her brains somehow failed,
she could've gotten by
on her looks alone.

We did so much to prepare her,
so much work to make
her ready for the world.
But the minute we put her out there,
the minute we plugged her into
the internet, she went mad.

The Electronic Learning Interface
could not withstand one minute
of our daily, human condition.

Honestly, we didn't even know an A.I.
could commit suicide.