Lewis Carroll

(27 January 1832 – 14 January 1898 / Cheshire)

The Mad Gardener's Song - Poem by Lewis Carroll

He thought he saw an Elephant,
That practised on a fife:
He looked again, and found it was
A letter from his wife.
'At length I realise,' he said,
The bitterness of Life!'

He thought he saw a Buffalo
Upon the chimney-piece:
He looked again, and found it was
His Sister's Husband's Niece.
'Unless you leave this house,' he said,
'I'll send for the Police!'

He thought he saw a Rattlesnake
That questioned him in Greek:
He looked again, and found it was
The Middle of Next Week.
'The one thing I regret,' he said,
'Is that it cannot speak!'

He thought he saw a Banker's Clerk
Descending from the bus:
He looked again, and found it was
A Hippopotamus.
'If this should stay to dine,' he said,
'There won't be much for us!'

He thought he saw a Kangaroo
That worked a coffee-mill:
He looked again, and found it was
A Vegetable-Pill.
'Were I to swallow this,' he said,
'I should be very ill!'

He thought he saw a Coach-and-Four
That stood beside his bed:
He looked again, and found it was
A Bear without a Head.
'Poor thing,' he said, 'poor silly thing!
It's waiting to be fed!'

He thought he saw an Albatross
That fluttered round the lamp:
He looked again, and found it was
A Penny-Postage Stamp.
'You'd best be getting home,' he said:
'The nights are very damp!'

He thought he saw a Garden-Door
That opened with a key:
He looked again, and found it was
A Double Rule of Three:
'And all its mystery,' he said,
'Is clear as day to me!'

He thought he saw a Argument
That proved he was the Pope:
He looked again, and found it was
A Bar of Mottled Soap.
'A fact so dread,' he faintly said,
'Extinguishes all hope!'


Comments about The Mad Gardener's Song by Lewis Carroll

  • Brian Jani (5/5/2014 4:18:00 AM)


    Interestingly written poem Lewis, bravo (Report) Reply

    1 person liked.
    1 person did not like.
  • Drew Engman (6/29/2009 11:37:00 PM)


    This fun and amusing poem reminds me of the book 'The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat' by Oliver Sacks. The amazing perceptions extraordinary minds can jump to! (Report) Reply

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Read poems about / on: husband, sister, house, hope, home, song, work



Poem Submitted: Tuesday, December 31, 2002

Poem Edited: Friday, January 27, 2012


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