Carlos Gutierrez

Rookie (10/23/95 / Managua)

The Pain Of Hope - Poem by Carlos Gutierrez

You are so beautiful
and flawless,
you are perfection with a cherry on top.
Your smile is so cheerful;
your eyes so mesmerizing.
I am helpless.

It was love at first sight;
my knees betrayed me.
Your face perpetually shines with light
and everyone seems to agree.

Gosh, even your name is perfect,
yet I don't think you even know mine,
but I forgive you,
and I'll keep looking for that sign.

I keep my hopes down;
I don't want you to crush me
because you can now.
Sometimes you do,
when I look at you,
and you can't spot me.
I guess I just don't stand out,
I just blend in with the faces around.

I know somebody that likes you,
or at least I think so;
they have more chances with you than I do.

I just want to be loved,
its all I think about at night.
I can't give up hope
because I know everything will be alright.

In my arms you belong;
my bed our new home.

Just imagine, you and I together
another part of my imagination,
and although it hurts to hope
I will never give up
on my love.

Every time you walk past me I freeze,
every time you smile I can't breathe,
Every time I look at you I fly away.
I'll be in space for the next few days.

We can be magic
but 'till then I'll be the only lonely one.

I pretend not to notice you
'who was that, that just passed through? '
I try not to stare,
but I'm so obsessed,
and I'm so afraid
to tell you the truth
because I wouldn't want to embarrass you.

I see you around them
and I wish I were them
they're so crazy about you
but they can't love you the way I do.

See the problem is this: I am condemned.

We're not even friends, I just hung out with you
that night, with your date.

I wish life and love weren't so complicated
this way my love for you could be demonstrated.

I miss you, but I never lost you
because I never had you.

You can't be replaced
I've tried that so many times
but I can't ever seem to forget your face.

I want us to have a connection
like those people in the movies
ha-ha, we can even share strawberry smoothies
but we can't and we couldn't
and it breaks my heart
knowing we will always be apart.

Maybe it's not meant to be;
we never got to see
the infinite possibilities.

I still hold on to hope,
although I do with the lightest grasp
because I try to live in reality
and events coming soon
will bring my love to a finality
when I part with the next full moon.

I guess you weren't the one
but I know someone is out there
waiting for me somewhere,

I will never forget who you are
neither your careless touch
that to me means so much
and I want to say that I love you a bunch
although it means nothing to you,
although you are oblivious to the truth.

Its so embarrassing to admit
that I carry pictures of you on my phone
and I was so happy when I heard you guys split
people say y'all didn't want to commit.

And even though I was rejected
I know that I am young
and someday my feelings will be accepted.

To my thoughts I have clung;
my thoughts of hope
that give me the strength to move forth
and never give up
because I still believe in love
you perfect angel sent from above.

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Poem Submitted: Saturday, May 21, 2011

Poem Edited: Wednesday, April 4, 2012

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