The Silence Within Poem by Fernando Alvarez

What has my world turned into?
Why is it filled with such pain?
Life to me just isn't worth living
Because living drives me insane.
Sometimes my mind races
On thoughts impossible to ignore.
It makes me want to hurt myself
More, and more, and more.
I visualize the blade in my hand
As it glides across my wrist.
I dream that I'm dead already,
And that I wouldn't be missed.
I've had so much chaos,
That I can't even talk them out.
I feel like I should be on top of the world,
To scream, to cry, to shout.
I hate my life,
Because it's not for me.
Why does God let me feel pain?
Pain that doesn't go away, or set me free.
Depression is my life.
I was never allowed to feel love.
All I did was look into the night,
Wishing on those stars above.
I feel nothing.
It's like I'm dead.
I'm always wondering,
What's wrong in my head?
Why do I have to endure this pain?
How do I learn to cope?
Will God help me?
Can He give me hope?
Those questions have yet to be answered,
Because for that I have to find.
But one thing I know, is don't look back.
Forget the feelings you left behind.
Silence is something
I know all too well.
So if you need help,
Have a friend to tell.