David Wood

Gold Star - 13,799 Points (07 April 1950 / London)

The Thirteen Days Of Christmas - Poem by David Wood

On the first day of Christmas my true love sent to me
A brand new electric cooker.

On the second day of Christmas my true love sent to me
Two oven gloves, and a brand new electric cooker.

On the third day of Christmas my true love sent to me
Three tea towels, two oven gloves and a brand new electric cooker.

On the fourth day of Christmas my true love sent to me
Four place mats, three tea towels, two oven gloves and
A brand new electric cooker.

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love sent to me
Five cooking pots, four place mats, three tea towels,
Two oven gloves and a brand new electric cooker.

On the sixth day of Christmas my true love sent to me
Six turkeys laying, five cooking pots, four place mats
Three tea towels, two oven gloves and a brand new
Electric cooker.

On the seventh day of Christmas my true love sent to me
Seven Christmas puddings, six turkeys laying, five cooking
Pots, four place mats, three tea towels, two oven gloves
And a brand new electric cooker.

On the eighth day of Christmas my true love sent to me
Eight chefs a leaping, seven Christmas puddings, six turkeys
Laying, five cooking pots, four place mats, three tea towels,
Two oven gloves and a brand new electric cooker.

On the ninth day of Christmas my true love sent to me
Nine washing up cloths, eight chefs a leaping, seven Christmas
Puddings, six turkeys laying, five cooking pots, four place mats,
Three tea towels, two oven gloves and a brand new electric cooker.

On the tenth day of Christmas my true love sent to me
Ten waiters waiting, nine washing up cloths, eight chefs a leaping,
Seven Christmas puddings, six turkeys laying, five cooking pots,
Four place mats, three tea towels, two oven gloves and a brand new
Electric cooker.

On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love sent to me
Eleven washing up bowls, ten waiters waiting, nine washing
Up cloths, eight chefs a leaping, seven Christmas puddings,
Six turkeys laying, five cooking pots, four place mats, three tea
Towels, two oven gloves and a brand new electric cooker.

By the twelfth day of Christmas my true love had sent to me
Twelve days of misery with eleven washing up bowls, ten waiters
Waiting, nine washing up cloths, eight chefs a leaping, seven
Christmas puddings, six turkeys laying, five cooking pots, four place
Mats, three tea towels, two oven gloves and a brand new electric Cooker.

On the thirteenth day of Christmas I said to my true love
I want a divorce for the twelve days of misery, eleven washing up Bowls, ten waiters waiting, nine washing up cloths, eight chefs a Leaping, seven Christmas puddings, six turkeys laying, five cooking Pots, four place mats, Three tea towels, two oven gloves and a brand New electric cooker.

No more presents please, and please kindly return them all. The chefs are arguing amongst themselves, the waiters want paying, and there are now nine turkeys.

Topic(s) of this poem: christmas, humour

Form: Free Verse


Poet's Notes about The Poem

Parody on the 12 Day's of Christmas

Comments about The Thirteen Days Of Christmas by David Wood

  • Sekharan Pookkat (12/24/2017 7:14:00 PM)


    A piece of poem
    dipped in friendship
    wrapped for your humour
    is sending you for your x mas celebration with 10++
    (Report) Reply

    0 person liked.
    0 person did not like.
  • Feipeng Shang (12/24/2017 4:09:00 PM)


    This is fun
    And one more present to you
    Is wishing you a Merry Christmas
    (Report) Reply

Read all 2 comments »



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Poem Submitted: Sunday, December 24, 2017

Poem Edited: Monday, December 25, 2017


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