There Had Been More But Now Poem by Gert Strydom

(for Daleen, after Elisabeth Eybers)

There had been more than spring that your body did bring
and the rosebuds of your breasts,
the bouncing of your buttocks and the walking away
that came so cheeky with the new season
as if every blossom did want to flower with you,
more than the heat of the blood that brings new life
my hart did sing along with the birds.

There was more than the sunlight in your golden eyes,
also the golden new tomorrows were mine,
the magic of the afternoon on the hillocks,
the bright yellow and darker golden irises of the summer,
all of the golden summer you did bring to me,
as a sunny angel of the light.

There was more than your sparkling smile,
when into my arms you did walk in the mellow evenings,
your proximity did bring heat to my life
when the night did spread out her black blanket
in which the stars did twinkle like diamonds
and pampering soft the evening breeze
did rustle through our hair.

In the darkness of my nights
you did bring my dreams to reality
as if all possibilities could become reality,
you did bond with me like a woman with a man,
did believe deeper and more intimate in me
and it was as if God was between us in this love

but now in this winter of my life
with the icy wind
it's as if I do only find destruction,
do have to learn once again how to forgive you
for inhumanity, sometimes senseless outbursts
with which you try to break me down into pieces
and where chaos and rebellion do prevail
in the coldness, the chill where the silence does cut deep
and your words and acts
do not count the impact on me and on others,
do cut right through me
and I do only notice the nemesis and witchery,
as if with demonic forces you do try to get me down
as if suddenly you have become, an angel of darkness, a harpy.

[Reference: "Die geskenk" (the gift) by Elisabeth Eybers.]