This feeling, no hope, no faith,
nothing left, what a waste.
Going to my special place, my secret place
my heart beats, my heart races, now a steady pace.
Close the door, check the lock,
deep breath, look at the clock.
Half past noon, not a minute late,
grasp it in my hand, but wait.
My only friend, my best friend,
who I know will be with me till the end.
Heart races, faster and faster,
quicker pace, closer and closer.
I hold my metal friend, tight in my hand,
concentrate, focus, until I land.
In this place of blue, deep blue,
all by myself, my thoughts, no one has a clue.
Feel the knife cringe in my hand,
shakily, wearily, carefully.
I press through, break skin,
blood gush, blood rush, blood pin.
Sink into oblivion, as blood drips down my arm,
cuts deep, careful around the veins, a charm.
A charm, like a drug, like heroin, addictive,
what my life's become, a rush, evasive.
Relief, streams through my body, carries me away,
a knock, interrups my zen, comes the voice of Tray.
A key, a key to unlock the door, my secrets,
my second half, my second life, my reliever.
A scream, pierces the air, the room, my ears,
voices heard, roaming up the stairs, nears.
More screams, more voices, more yelling,
too much, too long, not worth it, not a thing.
A second object in my hand,
I stradle it, cold, welcoming, calming.
Its surface, its cool texture fills my skin,
ready to go, waiting on me, better than the looney bin.
Touch it to my forehead, too high,
little lower, my temple, perfect, I cry.
Tear, a single tear, rolls down my face,
last look at what I will replace.
Heaven, sounds better than my life,
my best friend was an effing knife.
No appreciation, no love, nothing,
abuse, neglect, taken advantage of.
Mommies little boyfriend, visits me at night,
gets what he wants, enjoys it, it isn't right.
Bruises, scratches, aching, something taken,
mommy doesn't care, leaves me there, but when.
When, will it get better, be the end,
no more feeling or emotions to tend.
A single bullet, fixed that right up, gone,
no more abuse, neglect, emotions, none.
This feeling, no hope, no faith,
no longer here, no waste.
All goes dark, black, deep,
a light shines through, steep.
I walk, deeper and deeper into this light,
closer and closer, it is so bright.
I'm greeted by God, I feel,
love, appreciation, no neglect, I kneel.
I'm happy, one emotion, one feeling,
I wish to keep, still kneeling.
This feeling, this dreaded feeling,
is finally forever gone, still kneeling.
You have a bold and honest writing style. Your feelings here are clear and can not be denied.
thats was very good there is no bitter joy then blood runing down your arm
Half past noon, not a minute late, grasp it in my hand, but wait. My only friend, my best friend, who I know will be with me till the end. Heart races, faster and faster, quicker pace, closer and closer. its a time bonded poem and the sequence you did for is wonderful, time demanding and impressive..innovation is foudn there and thoughtful idea inspires hearts and souls..well done and its really a good and perfect poem..10/10
This is a highly emotional write up, conveying the feelings in powerful words.
I'm greeted by God, I feel, love, appreciation, no neglect, I kneel. it is true feeling with deepest faith in HIM..lovely poem... read mine.. o, lord..prayer..prayer for friend...go back
Could it be me or is your poem dark and depressive to the point of revealing not only neglect but child abuse in the most horrific way? ~Dave~
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
Well expressed feeling my friend...the flow breaks down in places..but that's fine..I like that....gives it a tone when reading and feeling this piece...well done