What Would I Have Said If I Had Known Poem by shannon wright

what would I have said
if I had known what you were thinking?
courting the thought of suicide.
how did you lose hope so early in the race?
tell me the words you needed to hear.
or the kind of love you wanted me to give.
was your fate already spilled in the stars
and your blood on my heart
or did you never stand a chance?
throughout the years I’ve looked at all you’ve missed
and sometimes think to myself “what a pity”
and other times I envy you.
1-18-08
jaw