Wishing I Did Not Leave Poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar

If I did not miss you...
I would not lay awake,
Convincing myself I hate you.

And I would 'never' give you that satisfaction,
Of knowing how much I am concerned.
Because I am not!
I could care less.

Or give you the right to 'think'
You can live without me.
What has happened between us,
Has not left me tormented.

Even though...
That is what you wish for me to believe.
That I am the one grieving.
Please!
You will never have it like that!
Not with me.
You are not even a passing thought!

Since I could care less,
How much you toss and turn in your sleep...
Wishing I did not leave.
I 'hope' you now have been taught a lesson!

If I did not miss you...
I would not lay awake,
Convincing myself I hate you.
I despise you...I do!

You make me sick!
And I hope you are somewhere,
Knowing it!