Witness Poem by Daniel Brick

Witness

Rating: 5.0


O clear winter night!
A red deer steps out of the forest.
She stands in a pool of blue light
and watches the lake freeze.

The golden angel of the western sky
beats her vast wings slowly.
Her crystal tears
fall into the same lake

the deer watches.
I come to the shore of the lake.
I give it a name:
Lake of the Yellow Moon.

I take the place into my memory.
The deer turns her head,
slowly bites a leaf from an ash
and chews it deliberately.

Above me
the angel hovers over the freezing lake.
Beside me
the deer stands at the water's edge.

There is no wind.
There is no ripple.
I will wait here
as long as the deer and the angel.

POET'S NOTES ABOUT THE POEM
I wrote this poem for the sake of the last two lines. The deer and the angel represent poles of existence, obviously far apart. A human being belongs somewhere between them, because s/he has an animal aspect like the deer and a spiritual aspect like the angel. I see the speaker's decision not to move until the other two move, as a gesture of humility and respect for things lesser and greater than humanity. Actually, this poem was meant as a homage to the great modern master, Georg Trakl. But as I revised and shortened it, the obvious connections to Trakl were eliminated and the poem must now stand on its own for any visionary resonance. The image of blue light in the first stanza comes directly from Trakl; the color blue was symbolic of goodness, health and wholeness for him. Angels, usually damaged, appear in his poems, so I put one in mine, but I do not intend it to be seen as an existent being. It's a trope. Trakl lived a tormented life but his poems are radiant, shot through with incandescent insights, with powerful metaphors that illuminate our divided selves and our longing for transcendence. If you have not read Trakl, I encourage you to do so. Trakl's poems express both the heights and depths of our common humanity; they have an intensity that will burn you and release you. He is one of the essential modern poets.
COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Jette Blackstone 18 November 2017

Beautiful image of a red deer in winter. The colors your depict in this poem also transcend reality, as you said the colors are used in place of other images or even lines of text. I love it when poets/writers use their creativity to transcend the limitations of written word. Your poem evokes and then elevates a common image of the Midwest.

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Liza Sudina 11 November 2015

So beautiful! I rereadit three times! I never saw a deer except in the zoo.not in free nature. but i saw angels! tha't more precious! magnetic poem and image!

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Valsa George 17 May 2015

On a clear winter night, by the side of a freezing lake there stands a red deer nibbling at a leaf! A golden angel On a clear winter night, by the side of a freezing lake there stands a red deer nibbling at a leaf! A golden angel hovers over the freezing lake... To this romantic setting comes the poet. So a trinity is formed. As the poet himself says in his notes, the angel and the deer represent the opposite poles... the lower and the higher forms of life! Man stands in between the higher form and the lower form! This amicable co existence should be the principle of living! Let beasts, angels and human beings live together in amity and respect! A great write with symbolic significance! I don't know why the deer is represented as a red one! hovers over the freezing lake... To this romantic setting comes the poet. So a trinity is formed. As the poet himself says in his notes, the angel and the deer represent the opposite poles... the lower and the higher forms of life! Man stands in between the higher form and the lower form! This cohabitation should be the principle of living! Let beasts, angels and human beings live together in amity and respect! A great write with symbolic significance! I don't know why the deer is represented as a red one!

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* Sunprincess * 05 June 2014

.............enjoyed this beautiful poem....could envision the whole scene, the peacefulness and perfect silence of a cold winter's night....., most likely and quite possibly it was snowing on this particular night.....those really big flakes of snow, which turns the world into a winter's wonderland.....with no other creatures stirring, only the lone deer.....and this man with his telescope, who is a star gazer....but on this snowy night, he sees more than the stars, he sees an angel of exquisite beauty with long flowing hair and perfect physique......

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