John Carter Brown

A Hole In My Sock - Poem by John Carter Brown

I've noticed, again, a small hole in my sock
And there's something I don't understand:
It puzzles me greatly, I'm baffled, and so
On this subject I now should expand.

I put the sock onto my left foot and see
That peeping out there's my big-toe;
This makes me unhappy, because I am sure
That left there, the small hole it must grow.

To effect a solution is easy enough,
So I swap the sock o'er to my right,
Then the known laws of physics get twisted around,
I begin to lose trust in my sight.

I cannot believe what I see on my foot
It seems that the hole has reversed;
It's moved to the left - to my other big-toe!
I now think my sock has been cursed.

I swap the sock back, and the hole moves again,
It's creepy - what does it intend?
It's back to the right, where it was in verse two,
I now think I've gone round the bend.

And so I surrender, it's all got too much
Sock-holes move, and of that there's no doubt;
I just wanted to warn you about it, and thought,
Like the toe, that I'd just point it out.

(Written Aug 2013)

Poet's Notes about The Poem

I think I need some new socks.

Comments about A Hole In My Sock by John Carter Brown

  • Bri Edwards (6/26/2017 1:51:00 PM)

    from MyPoemList, this now goes into my/our July 2017's 'showcase of and for PH poets', found in my PH site.


    bri :)
    (Report) Reply

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  • Kim Barney (12/16/2015 3:09:00 PM)

    This poem is fabulous! I love it. I have one called GOLF SOCKS that I think you might like. Thanks for sharing. (Report) Reply

  • Joe Hughes (11/25/2015 10:58:00 AM)

    Great John. More please! (Report) Reply

  • (6/21/2015 10:56:00 AM)

    Sounds interesting... I love it (Report) Reply

  • Kelly Kurt (4/5/2015 4:57:00 PM)

    A fantastic poem, John. Thanks for sharing (Report) Reply

  • Bri Edwards (2/6/2015 9:06:00 PM)

    John, you've inspired me!

    THANKS, BY THE WAY, FOR THE TIP ON SOCK HOLES! bri :) thanks for sharing. goes to MyPoemList.

    p.s. here is the result of your inspirational poem.

    - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -


    I jumped in the pool. I wore my Speedo;
    I thought my jewels were secured.
    To be modest is my virtuous credo,
    though, my swimsuit, some have demurred.

    Ten laps later I got out to off-dry,
    intending to sit ….in poolside lounge chair,
    but then an errant ball I did spy,
    sticking out of a hole …. with some hair.

    Yes! My left gonad was all uncovered;
    I wrapped the towel ‘round and went to loo.
    Had anyone else, my errant ball, discovered?
    I checked to be sure that I still had two.

    Two were there I found, to my great relief;
    that one had gone wandering made me laugh.
    I turned suit inside out. Problem solved, my belief.
    Hole was now on right, and right ball was bigger by half.

    Yes! When I was born the doctor said to my dear Dad:
    “Your boy’s right gonad is huge; 50% more than the right! ”
    My Mom was almost too tired to care, but she was glad ….
    that I had the normal number of what’s-usually-out-of-sight.

    Well, I was correct. My right gonad stayed within the Speedo,
    though a bit of it was showing through the silly hole.
    I returned to the pool, bending a little my above credo.
    I never had thought my rightie would come in handy, bless my soul!

    (February 6, 2015)

    i shall submit this as my next PH poem and give you some credit.
    (Report) Reply

  • Connie Yost (5/4/2014 9:21:00 AM)

    Just thought I would reiterate, - -I love this poem! (Report) Reply

  • Yash Shinde (4/12/2014 1:21:00 PM)

    .......people should learn from you, how to turn everyday incidents into stocks of humor.............lovely write (Report) Reply

  • Connie Yost (3/15/2014 9:06:00 PM)

    As I read this my smile just kept getting bigger and bigger - -I love it! . (Report) Reply

  • Howard 'the motivational poet' Simon (2/25/2014 12:47:00 PM)

    A nice laugh to brighten one's day. Well done my friend! (Report) Reply

  • (12/19/2013 8:27:00 PM)

    The poem is nice and funny. To a poet, anything can be a subject for making a poem including 'socks'. (Report) Reply

  • (10/24/2013 2:33:00 PM)

    This is a 5-star poem (or 10/10) . It passes the laughter test and the punchline is brill. (Report) Reply

  • (9/15/2013 11:23:00 AM)

    Great story, rhyming and telling, very fun to read this one. (Report) Reply

  • Adeline Foster (9/10/2013 4:39:00 PM)

    Enjoyed this one. Read mine - Briar Fever -
    (Report) Reply

  • Noreen Carden (9/3/2013 1:42:00 PM)

    Hi John very funny made me smile
    well done
    (Report) Reply

  • (8/29/2013 3:10:00 PM)

    .......and point it out you did :) What I want to know is how socks are lost in washing machines and are never seen again? Is there some black hole, some cavernous pit within the machine that sucks them in? Do they end up in 'sock alley' or down 'sock it to me hill'? ? ? ? ? ? Where are all the odd socks? : o))))) I know not still. Beam me up Socky, tee hee (Report) Reply

  • Valerie Dohren (8/25/2013 9:09:00 AM)

    Very funny write John - can't say I have experienced this problem myself though, and yes I definitely think you should buy some new ones. (Report) Reply

  • Diane Hine (8/24/2013 8:04:00 PM)

    This phenomenon has confounded physicists for years. I find the best solution is to sew the hole up while it's still on my foot because if I take it off I know I'll forget to do it.
    An entertaining poem!
    (Report) Reply

  • (8/24/2013 12:13:00 PM)

    Great poem John and very funny. (Report) Reply

  • Ozark Mountain Homegrown (8/24/2013 11:34:00 AM)

    haha! I enjoyed this very much! Funny and witty...made me smile from start to finish.. (Report) Reply

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Poem Submitted: Saturday, August 24, 2013

Poem Edited: Monday, August 26, 2013

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