kirilee S..

Rookie (11 april 1994 / Canberra)

A Random Stalker. - Poem by kirilee S..

A pest annoyed me today,
He emailed me night and day,
He asked if I were single,
and asked, how do you do?

He asked all kinds of questions,
wanted all the details,
of my very private life,
insisted that I tell him,

Age, sex and location,
he insisted that I share,
along with exact sizes,
of my bras and underwear,

I politely said no,
refused all his requests,
I told him very sternly,
Stop this, stop being a nuisanceice,

he kept on poppin up,
he asked if I were wed,
by then I was quite annoyed,
by all the things he'd said,

I asked him which part of NO,
he didn't understand,
I told him I was 85,
and wore 6 wedding bands,

but all my husbands now were gone,
and I had all their money,
you want to know about,
their accidents now, honey?

I told him I farted when I walk,
the hair's gone from my head,
I keep my teeth in a jar,
at night I wet the bed,

Sometimes I wander nude down the street,
till somebody brings me home to sleep,
you wanna get together,
so I won't be all alone?

Suddenly the emails stopped
so I wrote him an email instead,
a little sign then popped up
that said he was offline,

I giggled and I guffawed,
I chuckled and I laughed,
I doubt it seriously,
if my stalker will come back!

Comments about A Random Stalker. by kirilee S..

  • (11/12/2008 2:28:00 PM)

    this poem is hilarious! I love it, keep it up and i'll keep this in mind next time someone follows me home.thanx (Report)Reply

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  • (6/9/2008 4:43:00 PM)

    lol. thats funny, but good. lol. now i know how to get a stalker to go away. lol. i would mess with his mind too. lol. you go girl. lol. very good. (Report)Reply

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  • (3/30/2008 8:22:00 PM)

    wow that was really good, it also got me to laugh which felt really nice. Keep them coming, it was great. (Report)Reply

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  • (3/10/2008 10:54:00 PM)

    Wow lol this seriously had me cracking up!
    this stalker got what was coming to him!

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  • (3/10/2008 10:43:00 PM)

    Kirilee this is very good. Keep up the good work. (Report)Reply

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  • Jessica Rose (2/24/2008 11:49:00 PM)

    lol. Love it!


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  • (9/13/2007 10:18:00 PM)

    funny as poem kiri

    rofl! !

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Poem Submitted: Thursday, September 13, 2007

Poem Edited: Friday, April 8, 2011

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