A Three Double Session On A Sunday In Cape Town (Parody) Poem by Gert Strydom

(with apologies to Koos A. Kombuis)

I

My heart wants to sleep tonight
with dull tiredness
and my wavy tool
is having trouble.

Everything is squandered, degenerates
from the girl at the red traffic light
till the platonic smiles
of the two dolls in the guest room.
If my winds would just stop turning!
I would with earthquakes stir their salad!
from the Cape Town women on the waterfront
everywhere there are neon lights flashing
messages that I am celibate
and full of expectation.
Al my gates are closed.
I let no maids in.
The party of two has already left,
went to the house of another rich jolly guy
I am full of my own knowledge.
I sneak past the refrigerator
wishing the weekend’s hangover away.

In the suburbs I do not have a horn.


II

All my friends have a session.
Everybody is half way mad.
Everybody asks girls to undress.
Everybody is mad with a small town sex hormone.
Only I am more desperate.
I do not get a girl in the street.
All my friends are undressing the whole time
and at times have to leave a girl behind for commitments.
Everybody that does not know and can’t even guess.
Although I look endowed in the right way.

I am really endowed.
I am really wired desperate.
I do not get a girl in the street.

When the front bell rings
I am closing inside.
I am a ducktail without vitamins.
For hours long I bake food and cake.
The neighbours compete to be my friends
and come from far.

They say I am celibate.
I do not get a girl in the street.

III

I wish that I had been locked open,
rather in my parents house
between singing girls with condoms,
eatable girls.

I wish I had been at the end of my struggle
right next to the garden gate,
while a love girl jogs past.

I am endowed and have a struggle.
My fascism does not draw applause anymore.
I have served everyone. Nobody is as low as I am feeling.
I am devoted to sex
and cripple with delirium.
– Be silent my friend, while I am getting an urge.

There’s a big fire in my loins
while girls are avoiding me.


[Reference: Driedubbele depressie op ‘n sondagnag in Kaapstad (three double depression on a Sunday night in Cape Town) by Koos A. Kombuis. ]