Back Then Poem by Minx Videsben

When I was young
Younger than ten
I got pneumonia
My mother told me I was burning up, and when she carried me I was like a ragdoll
And now, at this age
I think back of that time
And think
I should have died then

A few years ago
When I was probably 12
I made a friend through the internet
And one day, she stopped texting
This lasted for at least three days
But on the second day
I felt alone, deserted and unloved
I took a belt I found in the house
And tied it around a hook that hung from the ceiling
I wrapped it around and stood on the bed
My sister came in
And she laughed, even recorded it on her phone
Told me to let my legs go
I didn't do it
And later we had pizza
But right now
I think back to that time
And I think
I should have died then

And now
Sitting in my classroom for literature
Writing this poem
I think

I wish I had died back then