Bantry Poem by Nassy Fesharaki

Bantry

We were taught:
- "Energy is two kinds;
-Kinetic, Potential."

"It is same with our thoughts, "
-said Shahla Lahiji; author of
- "The quest of women."

The thoughts boil and bubble
-constantly, permanent…
-to settle only with narration!

My thoughts were energy
-kept boiling, shook, shivered,
-made range of "Super-strings",
-gave prize to the "God Particle! "

Devil night's start was
-losing keys; in bundle;
- (on weekend, Saturday.)

Too ugly was my night;
-sleepless, roll-and-toss.

I was on "Bantry" headed East.
Thought of her; there she lived;
(By the Yonge, to Southeast.)

Were colleagues for a time
-shared coffee and the lunch
-in office, restaurants…
- (indoor-sales was our job!)

Once I went to their house.

She did things that I liked
-and the things, I disliked!

Seemed sure with ideas
-for herself, both of us;
-same did I, but for while.

I had kept my secrets.
My pains were inside cave.
Not-said, they were ciphered!

Meant to say: "Let it end! "

She, being a woman, diplomat:
- "Why don't you invite me
-to enter in your house? "

Could read her intention;
-her head on my shoulder
-our bodies in same bed!

Her father was sick with
-Alzheimer (not just age!)

I drove and thought of
-my day-night, disaster
-whatever the reason!

Losing keys in small area?
-in front of those eyes?
-was it joke or mistake?
-or a game of revenge?

Called friends to seek help.

Goodness was frozen
-friends' hands in pockets,
-had no rein on their tongues
-generous, but in talk and advice
-they lectured with nonsense,
-as horses galloping in a race:
- "I would do different…! "

Found comfort to leave them,
-burying bitterness and burden.

Managed to find a man
-locksmith, professional:
- "I am a magician! "

Looking at such friends
-gave me hate of myself:
- "Can I be one of them? "

I prayed not to be:
- "Hope am not! "

Small van was man's shop
-paper books and
-with machines to key-cut
-from the mass in box…

He opened, took lock out
-all sweat, he worked hard
-once, twice, many times
-failed but cut and tried.

He wasted four or more,
-but at end it did work.

-I drove half impaired…
-with my phone almost dead
-using its battery for calling…
-the friends who were fog,
-were lost in Sahara.

Therefore, I, back and forth
-headed for East and North
-in hope of getting home…

Boiled the thoughts in my mind
-the thought was "What to write? "
- (of past, now, when inside.)

What to say of friend prefer
-sex-party of TV, rest in bed,
-to going out and help!

Therefore, they and their talks
-are copied from fart:
- "Be short, fast and get out! "

Remembered her and ways
-acted more, rarely said!

Now, feel bad, dishonest
-for having dropped her,
-forgetting her address.

Yet know that though had key
-had to face those limits
-set by Ex and our kids:

"No guest and no friends! "
"No calling, no message! "
"Listen but don't return! "

Life was hell, over there!
-how could I invite her?

Before car was ready
-by Magic-Locksmith
-I thought of a friend
-who could have,
-possibly, keys copied.

He had one but not ‘Fab'
-and became next angel.

On the road I thought of
-her, our home, in her time.

On the road my thoughts were
-kinetic energy…

Parked the car, luckily
-a woman, very weak
-became saving angel.

When at home, I tried
-could not think, unable.

I cannot concentrate!
-deep in heart and in mind
-feel pain and disrespect!