Beloved Violence Poem by Kevin Eaglesfield
Beloved Violence
At the time,
I knew it was my fault
When dinner wasn't right
And you threw it across the room
And forced my arm up my back.
I knew I was unreasonable too,
To text you when you didn't come home.
I ached far more inside then
Than the blue and black and yellow showed.
You were right when you told our friends
How stupid and ugly I was,
And I knew I was lucky
That you chose me.
Surely you were right as well
When you said, ' No pain, no gain', in our room
And said it showed how much you loved me.
I cried so much before,
Not from shock and pain
As I got up off the kitchen floor,
Or staunched my nose,
Or waited for my breathing not to hurt,
But from the guilt and shame
Of making you do the things
That made you hurt so much.
From pushing you so far that you punched
The words and situation, never me,
Then had to cope with your own tears after
I'd made you into something you're not.
I used to miss you so much
When you weren't there.
Then I missed you when you were,
But I stamped inside
And you stamped outside
As I reaped what I sowed.
I was afraid you'd go, ashamed, a nag,
Nosey, a burden, useless, interfering, lazy, thick.
And guilty.All my fault.Guilty.
One thing I feel no guilt for though-
Telling!
Kevin, this is so good, women who get abused end up blaming themselves sometimes and a pattern develops, guilt and walking on eggshells never knowing when the abuser will explode, well done, 10 Lynda xx
Different - very different in structure and subject this time Kev....... this is dark, strong and admissions of guilt fall from it like a thunderstorm...... it is very readable and quite unforgettable......a 10 + from Fay.
Wowser... this is so heavy. Your candid account of what happened is frightening. There is never an excuse for violence, no matter how much we think we provoked someone. Awful, awful..... but wonderful capture of emotions. HG: -) xx
Great stuff! Wonderful expression. Congrats and well deserved!
Felt same as Babatunde Aremu. It really takes courage to apologise to a partner in such a boiling situation. This kind of accommodation, with no false vanity, makes the relationships in a family work. Thanks.
It takes courage to apologise to a partner in relationship. This is the tonic for enduring love. Kudos
I Like the tone of the persona, his voice is very sincere. This is awesome poem
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
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12/6/2025 7:49:06 AM # 1.0.0
Great poem.....you have certainly summed up all of what an abused person feels when in that situation. Very well written.