Bi Polar Disorder - Poem by Kurt Kacich
In my own realm I call paradise, I’m surrounded by glee,
Blue skies, birds chirping, and infinite grass of green,
Held captive in shock and awe of something so beautiful it seems,
The manic state of bipolar disorder, surrounded by Gods and heavenly angels to the highest degree,
Where hands of heaven hug the clouds in the skies,
Where flowers blossom from the tears of heaven from God’s eyes,
Where dandelion pedals fly through the air followed by a calm ocean breeze,
The tide flows calm where horizons light up the sky overseas,
But what happens when my world turns upside down?
What happens when everything hangs from the sky all around?
Does heaven turn to hell when the sky falls down?
Is this what happens when beauty and nirvana turn to destruction and ruin?
Is this the episode inside the projection of mind where felicity meets doom?
This is where shock and awe becomes shackles hanging from the sky,
Held captive from shackles hanging from the sky, looking down at terror and demise,
This is where the sky turns to fire and tears of heaven become drops of cyanide,
What’s called the depressive state of bi-polar, I call the falling sky,
The only event to save me is to somersault the grass burning a high,
The shackles pull my wrists, and my breath releases a silent scream,
As my feet dangle above the bowls of hell the shackles become a string,
The fire rises higher, the stench from the burning earth ascend from the pits,
Something of a living nightmare in a psychedelic trip, fingers sweat from heat as I lose grip,
Until suddenly I fall suddenly into inertia as the screen flips,
When paradise flips right side up everything left is swept away by titan winds,
The eye of the storm, the hypomanic episode of the live motion picture within,
Emptiness of prairies when the sky flips back up high, everything vanished by the breath of sin,
Norepinephrine rising propels in conjuction with darkness and the beast within,
In depts. Of loneliness within a mindset of lust when the monster grins,
Loneliness with no contact of humankind left behind when the sky continues to slowly spin,
But when the wind picks up and gravity is enraged, the world spins in the speed of light,
The mixed affective episode of bipolar, the human tilt a whirl that spins within sight,
The speed of light with flashing lights In the darkness in the sky that flashes so bright,
Hypnotized by spinning darkness and light, where the sun shines in the night,
The equivalence of fire and ice, with heaven on my left and hell on my right,
Perplexed vision of reality morphed into both a nightmare and dream,
Are my thoughts blind and my mouth closed when I scream?
Is this my conscious stepping into the darkest realm of inertia?
Or is the darkest realm hovered over blue skies and light or vice versa?
Where the motion picture film winkles with static, the malfunction of humankind,
Where the tug of war between demons and angels pull and come together to bind,
The vicious cycle that remains a closed book in the average human mind,
Bipolar disorder, the disease where society sees nothing inside,
Bipolar disorder, the vicious cycle that remains blind.
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