Maria Sharon Moemise
Broken - Poem by Maria Sharon Moemise
By Maria Sharon Moemise
For every word I spake he criticized and mocked
I learnt a new one to prove that I rocked
For every blow that he struck across my face
I felt worthless and got thrown in a dark place
With every step I took to move toward the light
I had my legs kicked from under me so I don't take flight
Every drop of tear I spilled in pain rocked me to the core
while he pushed me, mocked me and broke me some more
I crawled into my dark world where I dreamt of light
I dreamt of surrendering to sounds and sights of night
Yearning to just give in to the constant drumming in my head,
where his fists pounded endlessly, leaving only dark dread.
I took what I thought was an easy way out
the empty pill bottle, alcohol and me floating on a cloud
of misery, hopelessness and lots of self hate
for the pathetic life I held onto merely through fate.
Poet's Notes about The Poem
How can something so morally wrong bring so much insight to one. The weakness in me at the time also brought out the intellectual within me. The brute strength my abuser felt within him at the time, also brought forth his stupidity and cowardice. I was a victim, then I stopped being one. Instead, everytime my abuser looked at me, he must not have seen a strong man, but rather questioned his own actions. By writing this poem, I'm laying the foundation for forgiveness. I forgive you, though I'll never forget
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